Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Todays excuse......

Today's excuse for Maddie's 302 after breakfast......Ummmmm.....The field trip! Yep! The excitement from today's field trip caused Maddison's terrible high. Yep. It sure DIDNT!!! Looks like somethings going on. Imagine that. Dark circles? Yep. Corrections not budging even overnight? Yep. Here we go again.

Lets say goodbye to the lows and hello to the highs. Damn you Diabetes! Can't my Maddison just get a break? Looks like we have the flu in the neighborhood. 6 kids from Maddison's class missed the field trip today for the "flu" and Maddison's best friend across the street has it seriously invading their house. Full blown fevers, chills, coughs, name it....its all around us. It just so happens Maddison played over at her best buddies house for many hours this past weekend.......Funny, I think I can see it in her numbers already!! Not so funny, actually!

UGH. Here we go again. If there was ANYTHING I wanted people to know about Diabetes it would be that it NEVER, EVER STAYS THE SAME. It NEVER, EVER gets easier. Sure, we learn more and manage better.....but having the disease itself never really gets easier. It just disappears sometimes, and then comes back to kick you in the arse for awhile. Never fails.

Long night ahead. Now, I wonder how I can stop hitting snooze? Actually, now I'm just turning the alarm off and falling back to sleep. Not good. Its become a VERY bad habit. So much so that last night I only checked Maddison once at 2am. Even though she went to bed at a nice 146, she ended up at 202 by 2am. I corrected, set my alarm for two hours later and then never got back up until morning when I was supposed to!! She was still high. Which, means she started her day too high at 236. I've been kicking myself for that all day, calling myself all kinds of names, like loser and neglectful. Add that to the list of what I want people to know...Diabetes NEVER sleeps....AND, its a horrible guilt trip if a disease!!

Time to adjust some serious basals!


Wendy said...

I've been slacking at night too...isn't sleep something we need for survival??????

Well, I think you're awesome. I don't care what her meter says ;)

phonelady said...

Aww Kelly Im sorry you and maddy are having such a bad time with this and yes it never gives us a break . this stress with maddison cant be good on your diabetes either . So please take care of yourself as well . Let me tell you , you are not a loser and you are a wonderfull mother and you really care about your kids . I hope things figure and straighten out soon .I send hugs your way .

Kris said...

Don't take it out on yourself. You must be exhausted and you needed the sleep! I know I've slept through more alarms for middle of the night checks than I care to talk about.

I'm sorry she's been all over the place. We are having the same issues. Diabetes is just one big suckfest! :(

Hallie said...

DO NOT beat yourself up! You're human. We all are- & unlike the Twilight vampires, we DO need sleep! You are doing an amazing job & Maddy is so lucky to have you! It's not your fault that diabetes sucks. Forgive yourself for not being perfect & move on. We live to fight another day! Hugs, hugs, & more hugs!