Sunday, November 29, 2009

Sensor #3?

Saturday was day 6 of Maddison's 2nd sensor. It was working perfectly, but her skin was itchy, puffy, red and irritated where the Tegaderm was placed to cover it. I even tried a few days before hand to let the skin "breathe" without any tape covering it. It just wasn't gonna work. Skin needs to breathe. Exactly why I feared starting the CGM in the first place! Looking ahead, I figured if Maddison associates the CGM with such irritations she will be more likely to dread it or "hate" wearing it. So, sad as I was to remove the sensor, I did anyway just to relieve Maddison's skin irritations. It hurts my heart to see her reddened irritated skin from the tape. Isnt a pump site enough?

Tonight being Sunday I'm planning on inserting Sensor #3 for back to school tomorrow. I feel guilty. Is this for ME or is this for HER? Yes, the CGM has caught some lows. Yes the CGM helps me to see exactly where highs or lows begin, even with less finger pokes. All those thing certainly benefit Maddison. She just doesn't understand all that. And, she doesnt care. She's already complaining about my plan to insert the sensor tonight. "It isn't even accurate mom!" or "I hate having another site!" is all she's been saying. I cant get a word in, and, I dont really know what to say to any of that. It just makes me wonder. Is it right for me to go against her wishes? Is it wrong for me to force her to wear this CGM? Is this likely to cause more "control" or "emotional" issues than its worth? Maddison just having her say because kids do with anything anyway? Its so hard to know.

What happens when Maddison hits the teen years and wants to go back to injections? Would that be her choice that should be followed, or is it my choice as the parent? I never even wanted to start this CGM, for so many reasons.....then I felt I HAD TO because of crazy lows. Now that we have been using the CGM for over three weeks, I feel I "need" it and rely on it ALOT. Last night Maddison didnt have the CGM on for the first time in many days and I can honestly say I wasnt sure what to do over night! Even though Maddison sat stable in the 130's all night.......not having a CGM to refer to for every trend made me weary of sleeping until my next alarm. Crazy!!! It was like Diabetes and sleep were all new again! First I didnt want this CGM, now I feel like we cant live without it. Yet, Maddison wants nothing to do with it.


MegT said...

We started CGM 3 weeks ago with my 10YO daughter and I'm going through many of the same questions. The first sensor failed after 3 days, and we went ahead with another after a day or so. We got about 10 days out of the next one (Dexcom), then she wanted a week off. Already??!? I was asking. I was coming to rely on it and use its data to adjust pre-boluses, etc. Maybe get a little more sleep... But what do you do? It's her life, too.

She took the week off and then started a new sensor on Wednesday, the day before Thanksgiving. Ugh. it died within hours of the first calibration. She wouldn't let me put another in right away, so tonight we started a new one. Pizza night at the grandparents... so lots of blood sugar "information" tonight.

To address your question, I think like most things with kids and diabetes, it's a negotiation. There's not one right answer. They have to give a little, and we have to accept that things won't be exactly as we wish.

Recently at a site change, my daughter told me she thought she wanted to go back to MDI. I would let her, but seriously I almost feel like that's just the anxiety talking --- if you asked her that a day later, she would most certainly reconsider.

I don't know where this road is taking us, but I think the value of a CGM along the way for at least some of the time can not be ignored!!

phonelady said...

maybe when she gets older she will want to wear it or she will go back to mdis . I know you are having a hard time with this . Many hugs to you .

Wendy said...

Oh, the emotional roller coaster...


You're doing a great job with or without the CGM. Just remember that YOU know your stuff...that CGM is just extra.