Tearful goodbye

Harlee just wasn't getting better, I've had a bad feeling for days. Last night I just knew he wasn't going to be okay. We took him back in to the Vet for the third time this morning. A quick poke into his abdominal cavity to check for fluid revealed our worst fear. His lab work showed probable sepsis and kidney failure although his repeat Xray was hopeful as far as his bowel was concerned. The bowel wasn't the issue anymore, an infection from surgery had taken over. Looks like Harlee developed a Peritoneal infection (abdominal cavity) that hasn't been seen in over 10 years at this clinic. Best case scenario, 30-50% survival rate with aggressive re-opening of his staples to flush out the abdominal cavity. IV antibiotics for many days, 24 hour around the clock care.

And so, I cried. I cried and cried until I couldn't cry anymore. Despite our best efforts there just wasn't much of a chance Harlee would make it. And so they brought Harlee back into the room so we could say our goodbyes. I love that stinky dog. Maddison and Hannah's hearts are broken. Harlee was the "runt" of our litter, white as snow. He stood out from the rest of his litter mates because he was so mellow and loved to be cuddled. He slept with us at night, and followed Maddison everywhere. When he was just a few months old he had his eye bitten by his dad. A month later he could have nearly drown in our pool had I not heard his cries for help. I should have known poor Harlee was a dangerous boy.
I feel horribly guilty he didn't have his surgery sooner, although I know that we still had to "wait and see" if this sock would pass. And so the stages of grief start today. Our house is a little more empty and calm without Harlee here. Alot more quiet, and very lonely. Anyone who has ever loved a pet can understand. Our tearful goodbye starts today, I hope we can soon find peace in knowing we tried all we could to save his life. ((Hugs for our dear Harlee))