It never fails!!

Why is it that every time you have an Endo visit coming up, and A1c to be drawn something screws with your blood sugar? WHY? It never fails. Maddison has had a meter average of 158 since November, has an appointment this week, and the curse has hit just in time to throw off her A1c. It drives me crazy. I would so much appreciate seeing an A1c that I actually feel is a true reflection of her average over the last 3 months. After battling the stubborn highs for the first entire 3 months returning to school, I finally got Maddison's numbers under great control. Most days were predictable and she came in under 150 almost every blood sugar check during the school week. It was a awesome feeling. This past week will really screw with her A1c she has coming up on Friday. It never fails, the week before the "report card" it all goes to hell.

Thursday was early release from school. Maddison went with her buddy to the park, neither Josh nor I were present. It is such a relief that we can send Maddison off now with friends (and their parents) knowing she can handle Diabetes herself. She ended up in the high 400's when she returned home. Who knows why? She just did. Air bubble? Over treated low? Rebound? Bad site? Whatever it was, my first thought was "DAMN!! THERE GOES THE A1c!! Isn't that terrible of me? I was thinking it was just a weird and unexplained high. She came down quickly with a site change and did well all night. Friday morning she felt a bit warm to me. Blood sugar was good, no ailments. The nurse reported her in at 119 for her morning check. I had to pick her up early from school to leave for Tucson and to my SURPRISE she was 383 when we checked her in at lunch!! WHAT!!??? I checked her bolus history, all looks good from breakfast and her morning snack bolus. So another weird and crazy high is haunting this weeks A1c! AHHHHHH!!! A1c problem #1!!

Of course, going out of town can never be fair to blood sugars. The long drive sitting around in a car all that time. The excitement of going on a trip, the food. The poor choices in food! Ugh. I knew we were done for! Friday night we decided to go to a Pizzeria and wine bar in downtown Tucson. Maddison ordered Fettuccine Alfredo. Can you hear me gasping for air? Hmmmm, how many carbs are in that pasta in the HUGE dish? The fattening Alfredo sauce, the bread basket yumminess. Sheesh! Diabetes really sucks when you just want to eat your favorite food without feeling like a terrible person. We actually did pretty well guesstimating the carbs, but Josh being Josh decided Maddison should be treated with Ice cream. Well, why the hell not? I already knew I would be chasing the fat high in that damn Alfredo ALL night. 80c of ice cream later (ice cream is the devil in disguise for Maddison!) we hit the hay early and Maddison was just 186. I wish it were that easy. Consider this A1c problem #2.

I decided to have two glasses of wine with my meal since I would be up chasing Maddison's meal high all night. I might as well chase my own high too then and enjoy some damn Italian food right? So I did. Maddison beat me actually. She won the better blood sugars for the night. I was up every two hours to check us both and she hoovered in the 280's for nearly 6 hours and was perfect to start her day. I wasn't so lucky. I wasn't sure how to adjust my basal for the wine, so apparently I lowered it a bit too much! I was 290's all night and started my day at 200. THAT hurt. Talk about hang over total overload. ICK. Then of course, I crashed after breakfast thanks to the big morning rage bolus and the wine still lingering. Lesson learned.

Being that all day Saturday was spent at Hannah's Tournament, the food choices were poor. Maddison hung in the 180's because she was eating out of boredom. Sunday upon returning home Maddison went swimming in the jacuzzi with friends. Numbers did great even with the pump off for over an hour. I made some quick errands and called to check in with Josh for Maddison's status, She was 86 and wanted that tempting cupcake that all the other kids were eating. I told Josh to go for it, and bolus 40c for it. Two hours later was time to check. 487!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Um, what the hell? It seems my great husband thought I said it was "free" since she had been swimming so much. No bolus was given. That's A1c problem #3. It just never fails.

I'm guessing Maddison's A1c will be around 7.2% just as it was three months ago. I guess I can live with that, but I still cant help but wonder if it could actually be around 6.9 or 7.5% I guess it doesn't really matter, I've done my best and that's all I can do. Why does it always feel like it is never enough anyway? It never fails. It never FEELS like it is good enough, I know I shouldn't feel that way, but I think we always do.