One year ago today our lives changed forever. At this time last year Josh and I sat in the emergency room holding Maddison down as she pleaded with us to not let the nurses put her IV in. As tears come to my eyes, I realize now that at that moment I had no idea how hard Diabetes for a child would really be. Like I have said in my other posts.....its the emotions of the disease that is the hardest part. I think it is a million times harder for me in this way than it is for Maddison. (at this age anyway) She is so darn happy all the time. She never complains. She is an amazing, brave, and resilient girl! Even Hannah knew today was "D" day, and that makes me sad.
Amazingly, I have been in high spirits all day. I thought I would hide out in my room and cry all day like so many parents have told me they do on the 1st anniversary. But, today I am more feeling relief, that we have made it through the first year, and I have learned so much. We have battled the "common" kid illnesses this past year without it landing us in the hospital as it does for so many children with Diabetes. For that I am thankful. I am grateful that one year ago today we had a diabetes diagnosis and not Leukemia or a potentially terminal illness. Some mothers face a one year diagnosis date without their child. Wait! I am getting all emotional......I have to stop and get back on track!
I talked with Maddison today after school about my feelings and how "lucky" we are. I can honestly say, she understands. She may not understand when she becomes a defiant, burnt out teenager that has to actually manage the disease herself....but for today, she knows to think about last year and remember what she has overcome. The fear in the beginning is not with her anymore, I harbor that for her. That's what all the Diabetes moms do.
Now we are off to the park, Maddison's choice to "celebrate" her one year of defeating Diabetes. I am sure she will ask for some ice cream to go with it. Good thing we know today what we didn't know last year about that sneaky ice cream! One year defeated, and many more successes to come.