Tuesday, August 19, 2008

She never ceases to amaze me

Maddison went to school today after a decent night with less coughing. Temp basal remains at 150% and she did fairly well as far as blood sugars all night. Today she hit 320 at her 930am before recess check! OUCH! She pretty much remained in the 300's all day despite corrections. By the time I came home from work to pick her up from school I decided on doubling up on the correction amounts. She finally hit 160 a few hours later. Exactly why I prefer to deal with her Diabetes myself!

Maddison didn't complain all day about her hacking cough. She didn't complain about being sky high although I know she must have felt terrible. She has had the look of "high" since last week. She just looks worn out, though she will never admit that. She always amazes me. She came home from school and had her usual quick dose of Animal Planet to relax, then she was on her way (in the 380's!!) outside where she is the happiest, even in 107 degree weather! She is amazingly resiliant to running high all day.

Maddison happily zoomed around the yard on the lookout for birds in need of being "rescued." For those of you that don't know Maddison personally, she is passionate about our wild bird population here in AZ. SHe has "rescued" many Quails, Doves and Sparrows throughout the spring when they are readily hatching and leaving their nests. The birds actually seem to find her when they need someone to help them, it is actually kind of bizarre. Maddison even began volunteering at the bird rescue where we take the injured or young birds that she finds. She wants to spend every waking moment outside, looking out for helpless creatures. Lizards, bugs, lost pets. If Maddison is around, they find her.

I realized today I need to take lessons from my soon to be 8 year old. I need to live life the way she does each and every day. She takes her minor setbacks and chooses to surpass her feelings by finding time to do what she loves best. She heads outside and returns a much happier person. I can honestly say I never, ever take time for me. If I do, I sit here online and read up on Diabetes or speak with other parents fighting Diabetes. It has just gotten to be too much. I need to get away. I need to get my life back which includes other interests than curing and managing this disease. Too much time is spent trying to 'cope' with the hard days, not enough time is spent just setting them behind me.

I should thank my Maddison for being the amazing girl she is. She may feel sick, sad, high, disappointed, scared, overwhelmed, angry or tired but she always overcomes it quickly by doing what she loves most. I think from today forward I will promise to take time out for me. 10 minutes a day. 30 minutes a day......I have to in order to gain back my positive outlook that seems to have vanished many months ago. I'm headed down a bitter path right now and that isn't who I am. So, as usual Maddison has reminded me today of the importance in stopping to smell the roses, every single day. Or in her case I guess, taking time to visit with the birdies!

1 comment:

Scott K. Johnson said...

Great post. You are (and she is) so right!