Friday, March 14, 2008

Huge realization in my life

Yesterday I recieved an upsetting phone call from the family that won our puppy in the JDRF Promise Ball Auction. The puppy has a serious heart murmur, a probable Aortic Stenosis. The outcome means Congestive Heart Failure, early death if not sudden death from exertion. I am devasted mostly for the family and the puppy herself. Then I was angry because NOTHING in our lives seems to ever work out smooth sailing as planned.

Timing of our surprise litter of puppies was perfect. We were so happy to be able to support JDRF fundraising by donating a puppy. We wanted all our puppies to have a great home, make a family happy and it was as simple as that. But, we ALWAYS have something go wrong, ALWAYS. To tell the truth sometimes that gets both Josh and I down. We wonder what we have done wrong in life to be dealt so much crap. Now, we don't sit around and wallow in our wondering the "whys" or spend time pittying our issues, but man it makes us mad!!! And yes, I must say, things could always be worse. We still have our health, our home and jobs, a great supportive family and friends, so we appreciate what we have in life. But sometimes you just feel like enough is enough! Can't anything just work out right? Sometimes it is all the little life frustrations that add up!

So, I spoke with the family again today and they decided to keep the "sick" puppy because they love her already and are attached of course! They are thinking that if the puppy lives a short life then perhaps another dog's presence can help to buffer the loss for thier children when the time comes, and I understand the concern. My heart is just breaking for them, the children and the poor little puppy! I stressed to them that I want them to do what they feel is right for their kids sake, and make the decison that they see as the best solution to this terrible situation. I want them to be happy and content with their choice. They decided to also come pick up our last puppy that we call "Harlee" ......yes, the puppy that we have all ourselves become very attached to over the last 9 weeks.

So I suddenly realized that we still have one puppy for a reason. My mother in law who was going to keep him decided it wasn't best for him with her working long hours. Great I thought! That just figures! So we were left with finding him a suitable home. This remaining puppy is the answer to this families dispair! (maybe not the answer, but at least they feel better) Here they are with a puppy that they have bonded with and it turns out to have a unfortunate (at the fault of none) congenital heart defect. How horrible is that? If we didn't have another puppy to offer them we all would have felt horrible about the outcome of the frickin' charity auction to begin with! A sick puppy, a family faced with future complications in a pet they love, and nothing for them to show for $5000 that was donated by their generous family! I would have felt guilty for life!

My realization is this.....SOMEHOW, it ALWAYS works out in the end for us. No matter what burden we are faced with, we end up okay in the end. Maybe even in a better place. It isn't that we are "cursed" with "bad luck" at all!! We are continually blessed with an answer, a solution, a better outcome, and we are always ok. How is that for a realization today?!! This seriously hit me like a ton of bricks as I was complaining about how this is "just our luck" and I can honestly say I am seeing our short-comings in a different light from today on.

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