E-N-O-U-G-H

I've had enough of this thing they call Diabetes, I mean really. I'm hoping to get Maddison back on a "strict" sleeping and eating schedule in order to try and level things out.....so I have a clue where to start adjusting basals! We've been BAD. Up until midnight every night, then sleeping until 11am. What used to be the "dawn phenomenon" is now the afternoon phenomenon for Maddison! Its only taken me....ummmmm....8 days of afternoon highs (300's) to figure this out. E-N-O-U-G-H!!!!

Actually, this is still an assumption, not proven as of yet. Today I PROMISED to say no to breakfast cereal, no to ANYTHING with alot of fat grams for lunch and no to anything with an unknown carb count. I have to, in order to figure this out! What I learned today was....regardless of being 99% certain of every carbohydrate Maddison put in her mouth today....she still hit 300 by 2pm and stayed there without budging even with corrections. DUH! Her dawn phenomenon is now the afternoon phenomenon thanks to our LAZY summer schedule!

Tomorrow will be the experimental day #1 of increasing basals at that very UNUSUAL
11am time. Darn summer schedule. Did I ever mention how I despise the fact that my daughters blood sugars are managed after days of experimenting...trying to find what works and what doesn't? Yeah. I've just about had enough of Diabetes for this reason. I want to scream. I want to cry. I dont want Maddison to have to be my "experiment" any more! Why can't Diabetes just be shots? We can handle shots! We can handle counting carbs.....WHY is it so damn difficult and changing ALL THE DAMN TIME!!?? UGH.

Last night I was back to being unable to sleep thanks to Maddison's 55 at midnight. Recheck showed a 187. I REALLY wanted to leave that 187 alone. I really wanted to just go to sleep and not have to worry about Maddison being too high or dropping too low again. Can't I PLEASE just sleep in peace? But, 187 is higher than we'd like. So, I corrected it. Set the alarm for 2.5 hours later...Only to see an 82 staring at me. -Sigh- Now too low to sleep. 6c of juice left Maddie at 126. Perfect for sleep. An hour later I laid in a puddle of sweat. Now I'm too low. 41 at 3am. I can't get up. I'm confused. My heart is pounding, and there is no one there to help me. Somehow I found the Sweet tart gel hidden in my bedside table. I think that stuff is a miracle. I felt better within seconds it seemed, instead of hours as often happens with this kind of a low. Then I couldn't sleep again. So I cried. I've really just had ENOUGH of this chasing numbers game lately.

Hopefully a tighter sleeping schedule will help me pinpoint Maddison's afternoon issue with highs. Maybe not. My meter average is also the highest its ever been, and....I dont care so much. Yep. I really dont. I'm too angry to care. I'm too emotionally exhausted from chasing numbers all day. Hers...mine...hers....mine.... It is what it is sometimes I guess. Its all just too much lately. ENOUGH is ENOUGH. I'm at the point that I just want to hide...or run away. Where do you go when your at this point with Diabetes? I'm thinking a schedule.

Dark purple

Maddison's numbers have been horrible. 7 day meter average is 220...the highest ever. I'm frustrated, confused....disgusted with this disease. Nothing is making any sense. Maddison woke up this morning around 4am when I treated an 80 blood sugar with some juice as she slept. Then she couldnt fall back to sleep. Her tummy hurt. After an hour of tossing and turning, Maddison was a nice 118, and then she slept until noon. Blood sugar = 338....DARK PURPLE on the ketone strips.

I've never seen urine ketones so high. Maddison complained of feeling "weak" and she's obviously pale. My poor baby! I didn't see any air bubbles, but thats my guess since I've had to prime many out in days past. Damn Diabetes.

Maddison's been having alot of stomach pain over the past two weeks, is that because she's been running high, or is that the cause of the highs? Right now she's informing me she feels "pukey" and has a stabbing pain in her stomach, which goes around to her back. YIKES. Ketones are now small.....damn this disease. I dont know what to think.

Time to make a video

Maddison was asking me today when we will start making our JDRF walk video for this year's fund raising. Maddison decided that she wants to be interviewed and talk about everything there is to know about her Diabetes. She made a list of what she wants her interview to include:

Her story, including details of my diagnosis and how I "saved her life" catching her Diabetes early. (brought tears to my eyes!)

Explanation of Type 1 AND Type 2

Symptoms for parents to watch for

How life is now

What "suks" about Diabetes

What is "good" about Diabetes

and....what she feels they need to do to find a cure.

This should be interesting!! I'm so excited Maddison took the initiative to get this years video started, I haven't had any ideas!

Trust the one who LIVES this life

Ohhhh my dear Husband..... Yesterday I asked that you please take my advice. TRUST ME, the one who lives this life. Consider me the Endo, the CDE.....take direction from me! "PLEASE!!!" bolus Maddison 20c MORE than you think she has eaten when you decide to go out to eat. TRUST ME, I do it all the time. Of course, I'm far from perfect managing Maddison's numbers. I make ALOT of mistakes, but I have however, learned from each one. I am the educated decision maker for Maddison's disease. I explain this to people all the time, its not the Endo or the CDE. I am the primary care giver, I keep my child alive. Trust me, the one who lives this life!

I came home this afternoon from work to an obviously "crazy high" Maddison. I could see it there in the darkness under her eyes. The yawning. The irritability. 433. I have to question, I have to decide what the problem is! So I ask....

ME: "What did you have for lunch?"

Maddison: "Grilled cheese and french fries from Johnny Rockets"

ME: RELIEVED that this is an obvious wrong carb count from lunch! At least this isn't another bad site concern!!

So I ask "Dad"...."what did you bolus for Maddison's lunch?" (yes I realize I shouldnt have even asked)

"Dad" says 37c or something like that. I gasp. I'm really trying hard here to not get frustrated as I remind "Dad" that I always bolus for 20c MORE than what I think Maddison has eaten when we eat at a restaurant. I again explain how restaurant food is disguised as far less than it is, and the whole high fat concern. Then I explain how we always check blood sugar two hours after eating unknown carb counted amounts....to catch a low or a "crazy high" after eating out. I know he knows this. So why didn't he take my advice? Now, once again, Maddison pays the price.

By the time Maddison was checked at home after lunch, it had been 5 hours since eating. (they went to the movies after lunch) 5 hours after an unknown meal!! No wonder she feels like crap! Why wasn't Maddison checked sooner? They were out of test strips. Yep. We have a 3 month supply stashed in the closet. Thats 1200 test strips, but Dad and Maddison didnt know the container in her purse was EMPTY. Fabulous. I'm so glad I'm home tomorrow. This is where I want and NEED to be. Poor Josh, I know he felt bad, sad, mad and guilty for Maddison's "crazy high" again today. All I could think to say was "Welcome to my world."

Where we need to be

Thanks to our new pump site inserter arriving last night, Maddison was back in range within hours, despite the pizza and ice cream craziness. Back to where we need to be. Yes, I know I freak out over numbers...INITIALLY. I get all worked up out of stress and concern for how Maddison is feeling AND whats being harmed in that tiny body of hers.

The 200 range feels bad to me, when I was diagnosed in the high 300's I literally thought I was dying. That same feeling is what I think of and feel every time Maddison is "crazy high." Then I think of my Dad and how Maddison was diagnosed at age 6, not 32 like him. My Dad had complications within 15 years of his diagnosis. He was 47. My Dad followed strict meal plans and did everything he was supposed to do. There aren't any promises with this disease, and if research is as shows...genetically perhaps... Maddison and I are set up for complications regardless of our "control" or A1c. I'm not sure I agree with those studies, but its scary nonethe less!

Definition of "Crazy High" in my mind is over 280. Not sure why that number marks the level of my stress, but it does. If the "crazy high" is resulting from a bad carb count it doesn't bother me so much. It's impossible to get carb counts right all the time. But when Diabetes starts to take control and do weird, crazy and unpredictable things beyond my control....I become very angry at this disease. Anger isn't good, I know.

Last night Maddison was 89 going to bed. 4c brought her up right where I wanted her to be, a safer 120 for sleep. By 3am she hadn't budged. By 6am she was 72. Time to lower a basal rate somewhere. Perhaps this is where we would rather be with numbers, on the lower side. Maybe not. Too high, too low. They are both equally as dangerous it seems. I'm tired of numbers. Right now Maddison is right back to where she needs to be, nothing feels better than that. I can't help but feel relieved and a bit more stress free when she is.

Maddison's spending another day home with "Dad" today. I know he does his best to care for Maddison's Diabetes. He just doesn't do things the way I do, and thats okay. I feel bad that I lost it with him yesterday over ice cream, pizza and a
480. Life is too short, I know.....

Moms way vs Dads way (!!!!!!)

Before blogging when you are PISSED OFF at Diabetes, (or someone you love) you should really CALM DOWN. Today's blog post started like this !!## !!#^%
All CAPS, with lots of !!!! (I had to delete all that.)

Now I will start over....Lets start with the lost pump site inserter. I think Maddison's sites have been absorbing the insulin poorly because I have been placing them manually without the auto inserter since we lost it last week. In came screwy numbers with that first manual insert. High, good, high, good....no pattern. Friday Maddison was 380's all night long until 6am. Why was Maddison a perfect 108 to start her Saturday morning if her site was bad? Is it kinked and the tiny basal amounts aren't squeezing through, but the boluses for food are? We don't often see numbers over 200 without explanation. So, blame the site! :)

Maddison was fine all day Saturday, and even over night her numbers were a beautiful 85-110. Then came Sunday evening after swimming. 380 again. Missed basal or adrenaline high from swimming? Maddison's site was now twinged with blood, I assume she bumped it while swimming, causing it to go bad. (I always try to find a REASON people!) Another manual site change with lots of tears from Maddison! I felt sooo bad to say the least. That night was a repeat of chasing 380's all night. In range by morning. Swimming again, bad site again. Tears again with manual site change, although Maddison did her BEST to stay brave. Diabetes sucks people! You would be amazed what our kids go through. As if a few nights of weirdness wasn't enough to push my buttons....

In came Monday night-

Hannah played Volleyball until 10pm, she has a friend sleeping over. Everyone should know how "STARVING" Teenage girls are after 4hrs of Volleyball! Dad ordered them pizza. Of course Maddison was "starving" too, so for once in my life, I gave in and let Maddison eat THIS late at night. Blood sugars were great actually.....110 at midnight, with .9 active, but thats 2 hrs after pizza, what about the delayed pizza high? Hmmmmmm......recheck in an hour. 380!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm sure PIZZA was the culprit. Or... was it the site suddenly dying after yet another daily swim? It could have been both. Maddison was STILL 280's starting her day today. (.3 ketones)That doesn't happen often.

Today is Tuesday....my day to go to work. There's a problem when Maddison wakes up at 280. It has to be the site. I tell Dad to give one more correction, and if Maddison doesn't come down, change the site. I'm still thinking to myself...Its gotta be those manual insertions... I can ALWAYS get Maddison back into range by morning! With me going to work today, that meant Dad was in charge of getting Maddison back into range, and honestly, Dad makes too many RIDICULOUS decisions with food to EVER have Maddison back into range after waking up so high. I make the wise food decisions in this house, Dad doesn't seem to care. I AM the food police when Maddison is high. I don't believe in feeding alot of carbs when blood sugar is THAT high-period. We will not starve to death in a few hours of fasting or choosing low carb options while waiting for the high to come down. Sorry, thats how THIS mom plays the Diabetes game most days. If Maddison is high for breakfast, I give her the low carb option. Eggs and bacon, with a piece of toast or half a glass of milk. Thats about 15c, perfect to hold her over until the blood sugar comes down (assuming she will if the high is from a bad site) That's how mom does it. Dad is VERY different, and it drives me CRAZY!! I love him to death.....but HAD to talk some sense into him after today!!!I lost it! Freaked out!! Now a few hours later I'm over it, BUT, I still dont get WHY he ignores Diabetes they way he does!!!

"Dad" decided everyone would skip breakfast and go for an early lunch instead. Good choice when Maddison's starting her morning high, right? Give the corrected high a chance to come down right? NOT SO MUCH. Blood sugar didn't budge from 280!!Lunch was out for PIZZA AGAIN!!! My sister is in town, so after lunch and running around Geocaching with them for the day, they decided to stop and try COLD STONE CREAMERY!!! ICE CREAM!!! THREE HOURS had now passed since lunch and Dad FINALLY decided to check Maddison's blood sugar, she was 480, yet he still decided to let her have ice cream with fudge and cookie dough, WITH A BLOOD SUGAR OF 480!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND no pump site was ever changed as I asked Dad to do! I must say, we are two different people "DAD" and I. I play by the rules, and Dad plays by the "FUN" in life. (thats what he calls it) To me, Diabetes comes FIRST. Maddison's HEALTH comes first....not a "fun" trip to get ice cream with a blood sugar of 480!!! Sure, I've let Maddison have sweet treats when she's too high because "all the other kids" are eating it too.....but at 480 with a possible bad site? Sorry, life sucks. Sometimes you say no. Especially after days of crazy numbers. DAD CHOSE to go get ice cream. Mom wouldn't have had a problem saying "SORRY! TODAY ISNT A GOOD DAY!!" NO ICE CREAM AT 480!!Sometimes I say no, I say no alot actually..... Thats how we teach our kids to better manage their Diabetes. There is a time and place for everything. 480 isnt the time, and Cold Stone Creamery IS NOT the place when you've been HIGH FOR 12 HOURS!! Thats my rule. Control the blood sugars, THEN Control the FOOD! Moms way is the healthier, safer way, while Dad's way is just plain ridiculous...dangerous....reckless and careless!

I must say, "Dad" did give Maddison her insulin by syringe for the ice cream and included a correction for the 480. He did realize that Maddison's site must be bad, but it still DRIVES ME CRAZY that Dad let Maddison have Pizza AGAIN when her numbers were already too high for over 12 hours, and the fact that "Dad" let her have ICE CREAM at 480 is enough to make me vomit. He didn't even re-check for 3 hours after eating out?!! He didn't check ketones OR change Maddison's site? Set a temp basal....SOMETHING!!?? I mean really!!?? Yes, I am the food police for my daughter when she is high. I admit it. Some days you just have to pass up these evil food choices. Dad doesn't agree with me on that one, and I will never understand why. "Dad" feels that you correct for a high, bolus for anything you want to eat and move on. Thank you LORD that I am home with Maddison more this summer. TODAY is exactly why I am Momma Bear. SOMEONE has to be.

Dr's orders

This afternoon I left Maddison and Hannah at home alone so I could go in for my follow-up surgical appointment. Hannah was in charge of making lunch, Maddison in charge of measuring and bolusing for it. I wasn't hesitant today to leave the girls with lunch to manage, as I would be many other days past. Starting with short times of leaving "them" alone with Diabetes is a good thing, even if they don't get the carb counting right. I left for my appointment without any worries that Diabetes would cause a problem that they couldn't handle themselves. I did however, leave with worry for what this final Path report would show!

In reality, I know the office would have called right away if the report for either masses came back as malignant. Knowing this didn't stop the "worry" though! I think it took less than one minute for the surgeon to walk in, check the incisions, spit out the words "Good news for you... FIBROADENOMA, just like I promised" then give me a hug and order me to "get back to living life without worry again." And thats exactly what I promised him I would do. :) Thank you all for your prayers and kind words over this past month of wonder and worry! Time to move on............

"FROM NOW ON"

Every year around this time Maddison makes miraculous strides in growing older, and being more responsible. An August baby.....Maddison will be 9 this year, and today that 9 is really showing. I'm sad that my youngest is so "grown up" yet proud and anxious to see the young lady she becomes. I can always tell when the months are turning closer to her birthday, closer to another year of milestones. Each year around this time Maddison turns into someone with alot of new wisdom that she likes to share. Of course ALOT of this wisdom is based around her Diabetes.

Today as we set out to finish our Fathers Day shopping, Maddison came to me to say that she plans to ALWAYS carry her own purse with all her Diabetes stuff. Meter, juice, candy....even extra supplies like syringes and pump extras. Sure, SOMETIMES Maddison carries her own purse, but "FROM NOW ON" she says she is responsible for her own Diabetes stuff "ALWAYS." Wow. That makes me feel very proud, yet very sad at the same time. Sad of course, because Maddison's purse carries alot of responsibility that I still, to this day, hate to admit she has.


When Maddison was diagnosed at age 6, she had "fun" carrying her own purse with all her supplies. She felt proud to be able to care for her own Diabetes. Months passed, realizations grew. Diabetes wasn't so "fun" anymore. As any mom would do for their young child with Diabetes, I carried all her Diabetes stuff right along with mine whenever we left the house. Now Maddison is asking for more Independence, more responsibility with her Diabetes. This is a day that I secretly never wanted to come. Moms are supposed to carry the burden of Diabetes when their children are so young!! I guess its time for me to realize that 9 isn't really so young anymore. Time to step back. Let go. Its hard for me to admit that Maddison's Diabetes will be her OWN some day. More and more every day I guess. I don't want it to be. If I could carry Maddison's Diabetes for her entire life time, I would. From now on I have to let go of small pieces of her Diabetes as she asks or shows the need, I know.

When we arrived home after our shipping trip Maddison asked me if I would give her a "test." A "Diabetes test" she says. When we made dinner together I warmed her up for some carb counting lessons, only to learn that the test she really wants is a "written" test. So, thats what I'm supposed to be working on now. I needed to vent my emotions first!

Maddison has grown 2 inches in the past 4 months. She never misses a day caring for her lizard, her bird or the Goldens. I don't even have to ask or remind her to do so anymore. As Maddison is becoming increasingly responsible, I can't help but think... I wish Diabetes wasn't something that she has to take responsibility for! From now on I will silently cry inside every time I see her with her little pink purse. I hate the juice inside, the meter inside, the syringes inside.....but ohhhh how I love my little girl that feels ready to take on her Diabetes. I love her more than I could ever hate Diabetes. I think its time to buy some fun stuff for that purse!!Maybe some lip gloss and such. That should help me feel better about whats inside that purse! I need to change the way I feel about all this, I know.

Lost again

Where in the world do lost things go in this house anyway? Why aren't they ever found later? Somewhere in this house is ANOTHER lost pump site inserter. I've searched every room, cabinet, drawer......every where. Lost site inserter #2. I wonder if the dog ran off with it? I've been in a very good habit of returning it immediately to its safe place in our "Diabetes" cabinet, yet it is nowhere to be seen on this site change day. Oh man. Maddison wasn't happy! Somehow Maddison has come down with a fear of needles. How does that just happen one day? Maddison was the girl that never complained about shots. (except the night she came home from the hospital and realized Diabetes did too)Even when Maddison was on shots as a tiny 6yr old she would rather have extra food with an extra shot than to not have it at all. Poor Maddie, she freaked out a bit for Sundays site change.

I must say, I changed my site the following day and it wasn't so pleasant. It didnt hurt, but it was gross to feel the sensation of the skin being punctured slowly by that giant site needle. YUCK. Of course, I forgot to order a new inserter. What kind of torturing, neglectful, terrible Diabetes mom am I? I could kick myself as I realized last night was a site change night yet again. No inserter, again. I didn't even want to tell Maddison. Same as Sunday, she was NOT happy. We had to have a little talk about being brave and mind power. She clearly is letting her mind freak her out. Hannah came to hold her hand during the site change, and just like that....it was over and done. I still felt that yucky sensation of the skin slowly being punctured. Does anyone know how much we HATE doing this to our child every 3 days? Fortunately, we can still say this puncture wound is entirely worth it. We love our insulin pumps. Most people will tell you so. Instead of complaining, (with tears in her eyes)Maddison mentioned how she still loves her pump......because it "keeps me healthier and happier" AMEN. You can bet today the first thing I did upon waking was order a new inserter......x's 2, just in case.

Lazy lazy lazy

Laziness. Is it summer and lacking a schedule? Or is it just me? Lacking motivation? Why have I gotten so careless and lazy? I was supposed to be up early this morning for that date with my treadmill. Nope. I slept until 10am. The kids are still sleeping and its nearing the afternoon. I choose to sit and have extra coffee instead of meeting my treadmill, catching up on chores or paying the bills that need to be paid. Who is this person that has taken me over? This isn't me, yet continues to be.

I think I'm having my first case of Diabetes burn out after 3 years, x's 2. Diabetes has manifested every part of my sole...who I am....who I am becoming. I don't want to feel this way, yet I'm struggling to find my way out. It isn't my Diabetes so much either. Its the other tiny fingers that I poke 24/7.....up to 15 times a day on a bad day. Its Maddison's pale face as she struggles to find the strength to make it to the couch so her low can pass. The ice cream truck that makes me want to hide. Swimming that should be fun, yet causes highs and lows that make me feel guilty for getting blood sugars wrong, yet again. My Maddison who talks about a cure, and how she can't wait for that day to come. I'm tired. I'm tired of worrying about my little girl. I'm tired of chasing these numbers and I'm tired of the fact that no one understands this life we lead. It isn't just a number....its our future.

Lately I haven't even been worried about Maddison's numbers. Things have been decent. We still have unpredictable nights. 300's, 50's and all that normal Diabetes chaos. But lately I just don't "care"......Diabetes just is what it is....and that scares me. When is not "caring" being lazy? When does it cross the line between just living the numbers and not giving your best effort? For Maddison's numbers I ALWAYS give 200% and that second thought for all the decsions I make. But for me, I haven't cared. I could be making changes to my basals, my ratios, my lack of excersize......but I haven't. I just dont care right now. Its too much work to try and "better" my numbers for fear of the lows it may cause. My numbers aren't running out of control, but my meter average is up to 140 when I know very well that some effort can have me down around 110. Is that something I should fret about? Should I kick myself back into "caring" about my numbers or do we all take this little break once in a while? When is a "little" break turning into a changing lifestyle? At one month? Three months? Six months?

I'm tired of being so lazy lazy lazy. Being lazy is tiring for me. I spend alot of time wondering why I can't just get back to being ME. That itself is exhausting. Lazy lazy lazy......I hate being this lazy. If I really hate it so much then why do I choose to stay this way? Maybe this "laziness" is just me letting go of perfecting things? What is normal anyway?

I'm awake, with lots of breast talk!

Today was the day. Bi-lateral lumpectomy day. Thank goodness it's over. I checked into the out-patient surgical center at 7am. Blood sugar too high, 197 after treating a stubborn low with 2 juice boxes before bed. I corrected the high in half, I don't want to go low if I can't eat before surgery.....No coffee to wake me up.....oh man. That's torture in itself! I was so jealous of all those people in line at the hospital coffee cart!

((It's now 10 hours post "twilight" anesthesia, I'm finally awake and not falling in and out of a deep sleep! So much for the "local" anesthesia only plan!))

Upon arriving I was Pre-registered, blood draw.....by 8:30am I was called back to have a "wire" localization in the right breast mass because its so small and isn't easily found without ultrasound. This crazy procedure table had a large hole where you place your breast laying face down. Weird stuff! Lidocaine injection to numb the area.....not numb enough! I could feel the wire being fished into the lump. Pushing and pulling. Ouch! On to Mammo to see if the wire is in right. As if Mammo's aren't uncomfortable enough, strecthing your breast to China and back....this way and that. Now with wires protruding through my open wound! Double ouch!

No luck. The Mammo shows the wire didn't make it to the mass. Repeat the procedure from a different direction. Blood sugar 152. Perfect for surgery. But this time standing at the Mammo machine after being squeezed to death (now with 4 wires protruding from my breast) I got dizzy. I knew my blood sugar **should** be stable, so it couldn't be a low could it? I'm weak and shaky. The Mammo tech noticed I was pale. We had to stop the Mammo. In rushed Dr Z.....I asked the tech to grab my meter in my purse. Blood sugar stable, 158. Dr Z couldn't believe how fast todays blood meters are to display a result. I thought that was funny in my confused haze. Stat order for IV and D5 from the lab. I'm back to laying on the weird table with the hole in it after the panic of everyone running around preparing to treat a low that ended up not being a low. Stress and anxiety I guess. A boob can only take so much! Darn wires!

After half an hour to recover from my weakness, and with IV inserted (BS now 131) The THIRD attempt for wire placement was successful. Three times I was numbed, and all three times I could feel the wire trying to make its way into this mass. "Push" "Pressure" OUCH. I'm thinking puncture, not just pressure! Finally going upstairs to surgery....The 10 minute wire placement ended up being nearly 2 hours of torture. By now I'm exhausted and haven't even had the excisions yet! I was quickly informed that I needed to have "twilight" anesthesia, not just "local" anesthesia for the mass removals. GREAT. I didnt plan for this! I planned for a simple cut, cut, stitch, stitch. Blood sugar is 156. Turned down my pump to 50% for two hours. Medication injected into the IV....the countdown......1....2.....3....OUT.

I consider myself to be pretty pain tolerant. I would take pain over waking up from anesthesia any day. Pain I dont mind, anesthesia I HATE. The first words I remember asking the RN upon waking was "what is my blood sugar?" I felt low. I was 123. Perfect! The excisional lumpectomy for both masses took just 1 hour, while the torture of wire placement was longer than the surgery itself! I dont remember the drive home. I went straight to bed (thanks Toni!) and slept several hours. The girls gave me kisses. The stinky dogs pushed the bedroom door open to check me out. Weird how dogs know when something isn't right. 5 hours after the "twilight" anesthesia I still couldn't stay awake. I had a quick bite to eat, bolused half and went back to bed.

Now the pain set in. Not the left side with the huge excision. Nope. The pain is from my poor right side with the questionable tiny mass that was poked, stretched and tortured for an hour to get the wire in. Percocet. I really didn't think I would need it, but I guess that right sided torture did me in. Back to sleep, I can hardly keep my eyes open. Man how I hate anesthesia! Finally.....10 hours post "twilight" anesthesia I'm AWAKE! I'm sooooo happy to just be able to stay AWAKE! I hate feeling controlled by medication, anesthesia, Diabetes......YUCK.

So, I feel good! Monday I have an appointment with Dr Z's office to go over the results. I'm not worried. I'm just happy this is over and done. (and sad we missed Wendy's swim party for our support group today!) Thanks everyone for your well wishes! Time for more Percocet and sleep, Dad is taking care of Diabetes for 2 tonight!

Sargent Maddison

Thanks for noticing. (being sarcastic yet appreciative) Yes Maddison, I am eating MORE chips. No, I didn't count them, you're right. Maddison is there, keeping me on track once again. Funny that she notices, Maddison is my food police. I'm not sure how I feel about this actually!

Lately Maddison is watchful. She's noticed! If my 8yr old has noticed, I must be nearing a habit. Maddison has been questioning why I haven't been "counting out" my food portions. She asks me why she gets a serving size, and why I just eat from the container. Hmmmmm.......how should I say......I've just gotten lazy and careless!
Tonight Maddison asked me two simple questions that make me realize (yet again) that I can't slack with MY Diabetes. The food police is watching me.

"How do you know how much to bolus for that Mom if you don't count how many you are eating?"

"Won't you just be high or low later then?"

Oh my. Lesson learned. My child with Diabetes is watching me make the wrong choices. I can't just eat out of the bag! I have to count everything I eat! How dare I slack lately? (jokingly) I guess having the food police at my house is a good thing. I just never expected it to be my 8 yr old! I have to set a good example for my child with Diabetes......dang. For once I just wanted to pretend I could get away with it.....I guess not, LOL. If its not the high or low that gets ya for being careless counting your carbs, it will be Sargent Maddison in my house!

Camp AZDA

On the last day of school Maddison and I were invited by our school nurse to attend a VIP bus tour of Camp AzDa, the children's Diabetes camp provided by the ADA here in northern AZ. Thursday was finally the day of the tour! Maddison and I packed up our backpacks for the "luxury" bus trip (1.5hrs up north) and headed off to meet our school nurse at the local ADA chapter before boarding the bus for the long drive. The fun part is that Diabetes camp started last week, so we hoped to see a few of our local support group friends during the tour! And we sure did!

Our first hope was to see Nurse "Katie" who was Maddison's RN when she spent the first 3 days in the hospital after her diagnosis. Just like Maddison, Katie was diagnosed with Diabetes at age 6. We have been fortunate to see Katie several times since Maddison's diagnosis at the JDRF walks and such. Katie (now 20ish) is very active with JDRF and the ADA, and we know that she still goes to camp every year! Of course now Ms Katie is at camp as medical staff! How cool is that? Guess the first person we saw as we arrived at camp? Ms Katie!! YAY! That just made Maddison's day!

To this day I hold a very special place in my heart for nurse Katie. With Katie being our RN that first night in the hospital, I was able to talk to her and know she completely understood ALL of my concerns. That first night I was the "non-compliant" mom, but Katie understood why. The first RN on day shift refused to listen to my request to call the Endo when I disagreed on Maddison's first Lantus dose. So when Katie came in for the night shift (and I saw her insulin pump!) I explained to Katie how Maddison's blood sugar was 497 in the Peds office 8 hours prior, and that after being in the ER on JUST IV fluids for hours, Maddison's blood sugar had gone down to 82. No insulin given. Maddison's blood sugar went down after being re hydrated!! All on its own!! Katie understood my concern when the Endo ordered 3 units of Lantus as Maddison's first dose of insulin. Unlike the first RN of the day, Katie knew I wasn't being a crazy non-compliant mom. Katie validated my concern and agreed 3 units of Lantus may not be the best starting dose for Maddison. If Maddison was given those 3 units of Lantus that night I'm sure she would have had a seizure. After her dinner (no fast acting yet) Maddison was 493. Being entirely freaked out on this first night in the hospital, I slept in Maddison's hospital bed with my hand on her neck to feel her pulse. (a bit crazy I know) I was freaked out about the new possibility of Maddison having a low as she slept! By the time I finally dozed off, I jumped from bed as I felt Maddison's heart pounding. I fumbled for my meter, juice and the nurse call button. Maddison's blood sugar was 42. From 493 to 42....no fast acting, just 1 unit of Lantus as we requested. Thank you Nurse Katie for backing me up! Imagine if Maddison had 3 units of Lantus on board! After Maddie's low was corrected and she fell back to sleep, nurse Katie came back to check on ME. Katie knew 42 wasn't just a number to treat with juice. Because Katie KNOWS all about this crazy disease!!

ANYWAY...thats why I LOVE Katie, now back to the tour.....Maddison being 8, could have gone to camp this year. I would trust the camp staff 150% to be on top of numbers, night time checks, corrections....anything that involves Diabetes. Afterall, every staff person and volunteer at camp has some type of Diabetes knowledge and expertise. Whether they are an RN, CDE, Endo, EMT, Nutritionist, PCP or Counselor.....they know. Most of the medical staff at this camp once attended this same Diabetes camp as a child with Diabetes and have now come back as medical staff! How heart warming is THAT!!?? On the tour I learned that the camp meets a 1:3 ratio. YES, 1:3.....for every three kids there is one medical professional!! HOLY COW! I would have thought around 1:20!!! So, my point is...Maddison didn't skip camp this year because I'm too worried or fearful to send her. (well maybe a little) Maddison just isn't ready.

Maddison is really excited and talking alot about going to camp next year....but I just dont know! If camp was just a weekend thing I wouldn't be so hesitant to send Maddison off. But camp is 7 days long!!!! I don't even like to be away on vacation for 7 days!!! Maddison is just the same. Maddison likes her own time in her room. Maddison likes her own bed (or MINE) and Maddison is happiest doing her own thing most of the time. Maddison gets over stimulated easily. She doesn't tolerate alot of loud noise or commotion. Countless times Maddison has gone to movies or music concerts and has had to leave because the noise is too much. She'll even cry sometimes, then she wants to hide out in her nice quiet room and have some alone time. She'll climb into a pile of stuffed animals and blankets and emerge from her room an hour or so later feeling just fine again. Maddison is an INTROVERT by every single definition of the word. I just don't know how she would be able to tolerate 7 days of constant chaos with 200 other kids. I know right now she is incapable anyway. Seriously.

On the AzDa tour we got to have dinner with the teen campers! Of course all the young girls thought Maddison was so "cute" and many couldn't believe they were her age when diagnosed. Many girls said they all felt so "bad" for her....and couldn't imagine being so young with Diabetes. We talked to several amazing young kids during dinner, they all had lots of questions for Maddison and wanted her to know they LOVE coming to camp every year. I must say, it was really strange to see so many people with Diabetes! I'm used to feeling like the outsider with my pump attached at my hip. Every where we looked you could see pump tubing hanging out of someones pocket. Meters beeped from every direction. Juice boxes, glucose tabs and syringe disposal containers were around every corner...Some were even just attached to emergency boxes hanging on the trees! You would think I would feel safe and confident, but I only felt saddened to see that there are so many young kids that deal with Diabetes!!

Later on at the evening "carnival" all the camp kids gathered together. The tour guides arranged for us VIP's to have some fun at the carnival too. I couldn't help but think how Maddison wasn't that 1 in 300 anymore. Sure, we have support group meetings where we spend time with other kids with Diabetes....but here...EVERY kid has Diabetes! We were SURROUNDED by adults and kids that live just like we do!!

Camp AzDa, I think it is remarkable. I'm impressed with the organization, the staff, the knowledge, the activities...every aspect of this camp is remarkable. Maybe in the next year Maddison will prove to be ready for camp. Maybe not. Kids can change alot in just a years time. Camp AzDa in 2010? Ohhhhhh I'm glad **I** have another year to prepare as well!

Annoying questions

This morning on my drive to work I got a phone call from an RN at the surgical center where I will have my lumpectomies next week. Pre-registration and medical questionaire of course! I know I shouldn't be irritated when people ask those weirdo questions about my Diabetes. And, most times I look at it as an opportunity to educate. I know even an RN really doesn't know anything about Type 1...but ohhhhhh how I just wish everyone in the medical professions were understanding of Type 1 vs Type 2!!! I mean really....WHEN will the text books change to clearly define the differences and SERIOUSNESS of both diseases?

RN: "Do you take oral medications along with your insulin?"

Me: "No, I have type 1 Diabetes"

RN: "So you are diet controlled?"

Me: (SHOCKED) "No, I take just insulin, I have an insulin pump"

RN: "About when did you have the pump inserted?"

Me: (thinking ohhhh here we go) "Well, its not really inserted....I've had it for 2 years now"

RN: "mmmhmmmmm"

Me: Thinking I wish it were inserted and thats all there is to it. Like an artifical pancreas? Sure, I would take that over this pump any day. I know she's thinking the pump does all the dosing and calculating itself. (frustrated)

RN: "What is your height and weight?"

Me: "5'5 and 120 pounds"

RN: "ohhhhh wow, I wish I were so thin, strange you still need the insulin pump hugh?"

ME: Silent

RN: "Do you have any concerns for the day of the surgery?"

Me: "Just my blood sugars"

RN: "Oh, of course. No worries. We will have an Accu-check to test your blood sugar before surgery."

Me: Thinking oh how nice. They will make sure I'm in range before surgery....as if I won't have checked myself several times by then. (surgery at 10am)

RN: "So has your Diabetes been controlled since you got the pump?"

Me: Thinking oooohhhhhhhh yes, the pump is MAGIC! Just like that Diabetes is no more!

Thank goodness I'm not going under with general anesthesia! It's so hard to listen to MEDICAL personell speak so unknowingly about Diabetes. Aren't they supposed to make us feel comfortable and in the best care? The things I hear from medical people always amazes me! I guess all I can do is laugh at the humor of it!

Behaving blood sugars

Yep. Maddison's blood sugars are behaving in the mornings now that she's not awake at 6am for Summer Camp! Why is Diabetes so WEIRD and MYSTERIOUS? Saturday, Sunday and today Maddison's post breakfast number was perfectly on track, but wake the girl up at 6am and its all over. Dawn phenomenon, morning resistance, call it what you want.....this disease is crazy.


Me? I'm a straight 1:13 ratio all day. My basal is even simple, .20 per hour for 24 hours. I only wish it were so simple for our kids! Maybe those post breakfast highs Maddison had last week aren't related to increased basal needs at all. Maybe if Maddison eats just perfectly timed between 6 and 7am her ratio is hugely different? Last night I did the math (just because I think I can ALWAYS find the answer) and if this is in fact a ratio thing for that ONE hour, this would mean Maddison's ratio for 6-8am would be 1:10 instead of 1:13 as we normally do. That means for her typical 50c breakfast she would get 5 units instead of 3.8 units. The difference equals exactly what Maddison needs for a correction of that post breakfast high. (1.2 units) Hmmmmm....maybe I'll try that approach next time instead of adjusting morning basals! Wouldn't that make sense? Here I have spent endless hours trying to manipulate morning basal rates to stop that high and it might not even be basal related!! Sheesh! A light bulb moment.

This week over night Maddison is growing. Yep, I can see it there in the midnight basal rate that I just increased. Those brand new flip flops....yep. Too small. Do Endo's know how often we make changes to our kids basal needs? Do they think blood sugars just behave for months at a time? It used to be (during Maddison's honeymoon) that she could go several weeks or months without needing any adjustments to her basals. It seems all I do lately is change SOMETHING somewhere in Maddison's pump.

Maybe its 3am that I'm watching close. Or maybe its that 5am. Bedtime? Nope, somethings up at midnight this week! After lunch? Yep. It's there too. I dont mind adjusting to patterns. That I can do. Thats the easy part of Diabetes. Its the overnight basal needs that suddenly increase and decrease that throws me off the most. You gotta catch those. I'm always watching some time frame for Maddison. The basal rate that kept numbers "safe" yesterday may not work today. Night time is supposed to be the golden opportunity for "stability" without food interfering right? Not really. That little thing called growing interferes. Oh well. For now blood sugars are behaving for the most part. Hopefully tomorrow will be the same as today. Funny, I highly doubt it.

Last day of Camp!

I'm bummed to say that Maddison's last day of animal camp was today! What will we do next week? Todays camp highlights.....the kids learned about animal behavior and how to read animal body language. They also got to run an agility course with some shelter dogs and give them a much needed bath! Another fun filled day, how sad that this camp only runs for 1 week!

Yesterday Maddison had a birthday party to attend for her best buddy across the street. Pizza, cake.......swimming for 4 HOURS. Blood sugars were great considering.....that is....until I made some of the wrong decisions setting a temp basal reduction for all the days swimming. In comes the frustrations. I'll stick to giving an extra snack for swim nights from now on! Of course Maddison was STARVING after all that swimming, so she had some late night cereal....Bran Flakes at 8pm. I bolused less than the pump suggested anticipating the increased activity lows to kick in soon. Bedtime at 9, she's in decent range. I set a temp basal reduction for 2hours. To make the l-o-n-g, tiring night sound short.....Maddison's numbers were WILD. 260 at midnight, 280 by 2am, 350 at 4am and 270 by morning. ICK ICK ICK. Damn temp basal. Or was that the slow absorption of the BRAN in the flakes? Who knows. Sometime around 3am I woke from a deep sleep and tried to ask Josh for help, I needed juice and couldn't find the strength to get out of bed. Once I realized Josh had already left for work I had no choice but to find the energy to stumble to the kitchen for glucose tabs, my meter rang in at 55. I felt like I was 25!!

So, today I'm extra tired. I feel like I've been hit by a bus. I'm calling it an early night. I'm taking a hot bath and PRAYING that tonight Maddison's numbers are healthy. Wondering where my 55 came from at 3am. Hoping it doesn't repeat again tonight. Extra juice on the bed side table just in case. Hooray for Saturday tomorrow.....I'm sleeping in. Thats all I have on my to do list! (not really) Most days chasing numbers is just normal life in our house. Last night and into the wee hours of this morning, it was just exhausting. Physically. Emotionally. Completely.

Camp day 3/4

Yesterday was a crazy busy Wednesday! Maddison again attended Camp Ruffin it (day 3) and Dad was the lucky one to hang around to manage the D monster. Basals still needed some work....Maddison's 2 hour post breakfast was 230....how can that be after 400% increase of morning basals? -Sigh- Yesterday was THE day I would have loved to go to camp with Maddison! Yesterday they got to meet the Vets and watch LIVE surgery. Not the spay/neuter as planned....they had something much more interesting. A cat with a compound fracture to repair and some emergency dental work on a older dog. Maddison says she didn't even get squeamish! Surely she IS a Vet in progress! This was the highlight of her day besides the playing with the new litter of Chihuahua puppies!

After Maddison's day at camp I arranged for Auntie to hang out with Maddison and wait for Hannah to come home from her Volleyball camp. This way Josh could meet me at my Surgical consult. After reading the diagnostic reports I picked up the other day to bring along, I successfully freaked myself out yet again. Before my appointment I was fearing only the worst, but still believing "it" could never "really" happen to me. So....I felt better having Josh come along, even though I've been down this road several times without feeling like he needed to be there. Something about being in my 30's makes this "suspicious mass" seem scarier than before. Or maybe thats just because I have this crazy disease called Diabetes this time around. Anyway, this Breast Specialist assures me that the Pathologists concern of a PHYLLODES TUMOR isn't likely. His expertise told me that he is 98% sure this mass is just another Fibroadenoma. Why was that Pathologist freaking me all out anyway!!?? Of course, only excision and complete biopsy will tell. But, for now I'm not worried. I'm scheduled June 16th for a bilateral lumpectomy. The second bilateral in 5 years. Yep, this specialist says I just have to keep up with the yearly breast ultrasounds and biopsies if/when new masses show up. How nice.

The even better news is this.....I stood firm on my request for just local anesthesia. The Doctor asked me why I am so hesitant to have the general anesthesia, so I told him that the whole Diabetes thing and going under really makes me nervous. I explained to him that I typically don't do well with recovering from general anesthesia and I am likely to be stuck in deep sleep for many hours afterwards. Not safe when I need to know what my blood sugar is after fasting all day! Do you know what he replied with? He assured me that the staff would check my blood sugar several times during the surgery, then he suggested I turn down my pump and run a bit higher before surgery, after and during, to be safe. WHAT AN AWESOME BRILLIANT MAN HE IS!! A doctor that knows what he is talking about when it comes to a pump! He understood my concerns (and fears) and has agreed to just LOCAL anesthesia for the procedure! YAY! Now I dont have to worry about the anesthesia! June 16th is the date. I'm anxious to get it done :)

After my consult the girls and I met my Dad for our Wednesday night dinner before Hannah's sand tournament. My Dad seems happier each visit! He just had his foot re-casted. The doctor reported that the foot looks less swollen and the warmth has diminished. YAY!

Halfway through Hannah's sand tournament I heard Maddison scream out from across the court. In her hand she was proud to show me a tiny baby quail chick that she swooped up as he scampered along looking for his covey. No covey to be seen. Needless to say, after Volleyball we had a little quail chick to turn in to the rescue!

Today was day 4 of Camp Ruffin it! I moved back all Maddison's basal rates, now starting the increases to kick in by 6:30am for that dawn phenomenon thats been haunting us since being back to early mornings. Well....I really screwed up this time. Maddison woke up at 88. Quick bath, time for breakfast. No pre-bolus on a day you dont know what to expect. Good thing! As Maddison sat down to her her typical breakfast I decided to see which way the new basals had her going. She was 66! Yep, I had already bolused as the meal began. 15c of juice with breakfast will do. Re-check AFTER eating....78. Ummmm...I can see where this is going. No where. She's gonna hang around the 80's with too much active to be comfortable. 13c Gogurt. recheck as we get to camp....88. OMG, can we PLEASE just have a good morning!!?? Two life savers. Re-check. 122. Better, still scary. 2 hours post she's 146 with .6 active. Juice. Snack in one hour. She's 126. Despite the stressful start (for me) to camp Day 4 it was FUN, FUN, FUN!!

Tomorrow......what to do with basals? Obviously I need to move the time I **thought** the dawn phenomenon kicked in. Sheesh! I was lucky today. I caught the lows before they happened. What to do.....what to do..........Tomorrow is the last day of camp. I wish Maddison had something like this to do every day this summer! Tomorrow the kids will learn to teach obedience to their pets. They will have a chance to do agility courses with several shelter dogs AND.....its BATH TIME! Some very lucky shelter dogs Will get a bath from some very excited and eager kids! My camera is going back to camp tomorrow!

Camp day 2

Today was Josh's day off, so it was my day to go to work. Gotta love that summer schedule, two full days instead of 5 half days for me! Maddison got to attend camp "Ruffin it" with her Dad today, I was so jealous! Today was "Hero for the planet day." So I hear, the kids learned about endangered species and the exotic pet trade. They played games about bio-diversity, explored the food web and learned about iguanas, chinchillas and parrots! Maddison was bright eyed and so excited to tell me all about spending time in the kitten room today. Guess what tomorrow is all about!!??? Animal medicine! The camp kids get to meet the ASPCA vets and watch a real spay and neuter surgery!!!OH MY!! They will also dissect squid and owl "pellets" (yes thats poop, and it actually tells alot about what they eat!)and they will learn pet first aid. A dream day for Maddie!

Hannah started camp yesterday for Volleyball as well, she was thinking it would be far beneath her play level, which is true. My point in choosing this camp for Hannah was that she gets 3hrs of play time EVERY day of the week, something that no other camp offered. She just needs to get moving every day to stay fit and in "training" mode for next season! Anyway, today after volleyball camp Hannah was EXHAUSTED. The coach focused on "conditioning" and agility, I was so happy! Thats exactly what she needs for a long lazy summer! Tomorrow she will also have Wednesday sand tournament night.......she better get to bed early tonight!

Remember how I said I set that new basal pattern for Maddison's mornings starting today at camp? Well, it helps if you remember to select the RIGHT pattern after setting it up!!! All the way to work this morning I worried about that new basal pattern being too much insulin. I pictured Maddison at camp drinking juice after juice and being crazy low. Not so, she was 230 2 hours post prandial when Dad called to inform me, it was then that I realized I probably didn't activate the new pattern I set up!! Yep!! I sure didn't! On to experiment with blood sugars tomorrow I guess! Funny how if I am there with Maddison myself I don't worry, I just do what I gotta do.....but if someone else is in charge I will worry all day! -Sigh- Over protective mother I am, even when Dad is in charge!

I got a phone call today from the surgeons office....they were able to move my appointment up to tomorrow (Wednesday) at 3pm instead of as originally scheduled for Friday. Thank you cancellation list! I just want this all over and done with! I picked up my films and reports today from the breast care center on my way home from work. I REALLY shouldn't have read the reports. There is a little more information in there than I wanted to hear. Things like "lobulated mass with an indistinct margin" (makes me worry more!) and "color flow imaging demonstrates increased vascularity" (not good!) then the scariest "hypoechoic" term is thrown in there a time or two! YIKES!! DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER KELLY!! Wait for the consult, the excision and the RESULT! It is what it is.....I don't need to worry anymore than I have!! More tomorrow.....

Camp "Ruffin it" Day 1

Maddison was so excited to start ASPCA animal camp today that she couldn't sleep last night. You would think we were going to Disneyland or something! At Midnight when I went to check on Maddison she was STILL AWAKE!!!! She kept telling me how excited she was and that she was "really" trying to sleep but couldn't. Blood sugars were GREAT overnight, surprisingly. When my alarm went off at 5:30am to get ready to go for the morning, Maddison came walking down the hall with a great big smile on her face! She was so excited for today that my alarm woke her up too!!

Unfortunately, the icky part of our morning was Maddison's 2 hour after breakfast number.....298. Funny how waking up at a school morning time frame changes everything back to what it used to be. How does that even make sense? Looks like we need a 400% basal rate again for early wake up mornings! Summer sleeping in is really THAT different? Damn Diabetes is CRAZY! Needless to say, I set an early morning basal pattern in Maddison's pump for tomorrow at camp.....we shall see!

Upon arriving at Camp the kids were introduced to the Desert Tortoises that reside there. A quick talk about desert creatures and the kids headed off to tour all areas of the facility. After a brief review of the Camp rules and getting to know each other it was time for FUN!! First the kids formed small groups to go on a scavenger hunt. The scavenger hunt included questions like "How many food dishes are in the kitten room" or "what is the name of the dog in kennel 2A?" It was so much fun! After the scavenger hunt the kids learned about the pet of the day.....Guinea pigs. After learning all there is to know about Guniea pigs, the kids got to make "skewer meals" for all the shelter small animals and reptiles. The kids cut up fruit and veggies of all colors and skewered them to be used in the future for feeding. HOW FUN IS THAT!? After skewers the kids made cat toys for the shelter animals. The best part.....they got to go spend time in the cat and kitten rooms trying them out and making new furry friends! They had soooo much fun and learning packed into one day, it was amazing. The kids even got to care for an assigned area.....Maddison was assigned to FERRETS!! Lots of dirty work involved!! All the shelter residents had nice clean cages to come back too.


I tried as best I could to stay in the shadows today while I attended camp with Maddison. There were still the typical kid questions. One girl asked Maddison "Why is your mom still here?" and Maddison replied with a shrug of the shoulders and changed the subject. I checked Maddison's blood sugar as privately as I could without drawing any attention. I just needed that after breakfast number! No one seemed to notice until they passed out a snack later on. Maddison took it upon herself to say "I have type 1 Diabetes but I can still eat whatever snack you have for us!" All I could do was smile. Then came the questions from one little girl around age 10. "Do you have to poke your finger and check your blood?" to which Maddison replied "Yep!" Then the girl asked her if it hurts.....Maddison replied "Nah...not anymore." The girl seemed fine with those questions and then the day resumed without another Diabetes moment!

Bearded dragons, bunnies, ferrets, kittens, turtles, tarantualas, iguanas, parrots, dogs, fish, snakes, chinchillas.....this is the place for Maddison! I really can't say enough good things about this camp....they kept the kids so busy that the 4 hours flew by. At the end of the day the kids played "Animal Jeopardy." It was so funny to see the faces of all the older kids when Maddison got soooo many questions right! We can't wait for tomorrow!