Saturday, August 9, 2008

Each new school year = starting over

Tonight I was reading a blog of another mom that has a child with Type 1. She mentioned that every year when school comes back around us Diabetes parents start over. All I could think was, WOW. We really do. Every new school year we start over. WE have a new set of teachers to educate. A new schedule to work around, which probably brings about alot of insulin changes. Why isn't there some magic dose of insulin anyway? Why is Diabetes the only disease in which you have to make guesstimates every single day? Why isn't it simply one unit of insulin for this or two units for this? We play this game to "manage" the disease multiple times a day for each meal based around the trending numbers of today, or the days activity. Add a new school year to all the normal adjusting we do each day and what you get is starting over. Again. I'm tired of starting over.

Maddison's school pretty much blew me off with planning the 504 revision before school starts on Monday. We aren't scheduled until next week officially. Maddison has a teacher this year that moved up from her music class last year. If she had a teacher that was unaware of the Diabetes I would not have let the 504 meeting slide. Thursday the school nurse decided to inform me that 2nd grade lunch has been moved to 12:30. This means after lunch recess they have just 45min of school left! Ridiculous! We now have to incorporate snack time after morning recess followed by PE as well. Wow. Her schedule couldn't be any worse for Diabetes. I'm pretty stressed out knowing I have alot to consider in making her day level out. Oh well, I always figure it out eventually.

Monday is the day! This being our 3rd year in school with Diabetes I feel pretty comfortable. Our nurse is great. She has been educating Maddison's teacher all week. I know her new teacher already knows Maddison well from last year so that helps tremendously. I just worry about getting her blood sugar balanced for optimal learning while avoiding the nasty lows that can take alot out of you physically. Otherwise, I know she is safe in school.

When Maddison returned to school 13 days after being diagnosed back in 2006 I nearly had an emotional breakdown. Well, I guess I did actually. At that time she didn't really know what a low felt like. I had to turn and walk out the classroom door wishing for the best, but fearing the worst. As soon as the door closed I sobbed uncontrollably all the way down the hall. I couldn't drive away. I didn't want to be too far in case she experienced her first low blood sugar reaction. I think I cried many days on end after that. To think that every day another mom out there drops off their child with Diabetes at school for the first time is very emotional for me. I don't think I could ever forget that feeling as long as I live.

So this year is different. We still have the same worries as I think we always will. This is the first year that I'm not nauseated with fear to leave her in someone else's care. I still worry what her blood sugar will do, but I know I will figure out what I need to adjust. I have confidence in our school nurse. I'm confident that Maddison will catch her highs and lows before they get serious. We hope to work on Maddison's Independence so she can perhaps manage her own insulin at snack time with supervision from the teacher to avoid so many trips to the nurse each day. I think this will be a year that Maddison gains alot of confidence. I believe she is approaching a time of willingness and readiness to take on alot more responsibility in her care. It saddens me that she will carry such a "burden" at her young age, but I also know she is proud of herself for caring for her own disease. I guess starting over is just in the name of our game.

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