Vacation is over but not the Honeymoon!

Tomorrow the girls go back to school after 3 weeks of winter break. I have always liked my kids being home. I never wanted to send them to school because they are just what I do every day!I am totally a care taker, and happiest when I have someone to care for. But since Diabetes came along for Maddison I have learned that the routine of school makes management so much easier. The predictable routine saves my sanity in fluctuating blood sugar land. So tomorrow I am looking forward to them being at school, where I know they are occupied and safe.

It was really hard to be at work when they had Great Grandma and Auntie's watching them while I worked my 3 days a week. Big sister Hannah did all the Diabetes work for Maddison, she carbed out and managed highs and lows with adult presence. Hannah lives it with us every day, so she was best at doing this for Maddison since she knows how the pump works and Grandma hasn't been trained yet. So Hannah called me many, many times a day to verify what she was doing. Man, was that stressful. Expecially when she would call saying Maddison was low. Yes, she had adults there that understood low treatment, but you just never know the details of the day! How much has she been running around? Is she coming up or dropping lower?-Ugh

So, I am where the honeymoon part comes in to play, yep...that would be me. I have been playing this Diabetes game for 22 months now since I was diagnosed St Patricks day 2006. Well, I decided I needed to do some basal testing. So, out of the blue I wondered if I even needed my measly 2.45 units of basal I get over 24 hours. That is nothing. For my 118lb body I should require around 20 units a day just for basal amounts when not eating. But no, I am still considered in the "honeymoon" stage

So, I turned off my basals and decided to do my fasting tests, which really sucks because that means no morning coffee!!! At 8pm I started with ZERO insulin. I was 167. But, instead of correcting of course, I left it. I checked myself at midnight when the alarm sounded for Maddison's check....I was 223! YIKES! I have to say at first I thought DAMN! I better just turn the basal back on, but I know myself pretty darn well and a few hours was safe. Well, I slept though the 3am alarm to check Maddison and jumped out of bed at 7:45, late for work. I thought for sure I would be at some near death number. I was 101!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the hell? That is lower than the 120 I always wake up at!! So being on the right track, (and late for work anyway) I decided to just leave my pump set at ZERO. I checked every hour as standard basal tests go......I was 101 then 118 then 131......Ok, I was starving to DEATH. I obviously don't need that measly 2.45 units I pump for basals. But screw this, I need my coffee. As scared as I was to NOT take insulin for carbs, I had my 6c Double Shot Expresso Light with no bolus!!An hour later I was 109. What!?? So, I decided to go for it. I had a 13c low sugar yogurt drink and a handful of Pecans. An hour later I was 168 (with no insulin!) then 104 then 90 by hour 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I starved myself until dinner and called it that. Josh kept telling me to eat my 80c dinner without insulin, but who is he trying to kid? My stressed, barely working pancreas could never catch up to 80c, and probably not even recover on its own!

WOW! I can't tell you enough how empowered I felt that ((((((((((((I))))))))))))))))))))) was in control, not Diabetes. I felt completely cured, although we all know what would happen if I had continued this experiment and eaten normally. But at this point it doesn't matter. I didn't need insulin, for a whole day! If the average person with Diabetes went without their insulin for a whole day they would be extremely ill. In a weird way I am motivated to continue this way. So I am back to my treadmill 5 times a week and low carb. I need to anyway. I feel like a big mush ball after not working out routinely since Maddison was diagnosed. And, we all know about Holidays. I was a too skinny 107lbs in October and I am back to 118 after the wrath of the holidays (and defeating depression) Problem is, if I eat low carb I lose too much weight. But, I would like to continue on this power trip of mine and feel as though I am disease free. So, I will keep my 2.45 basal just to encourage my resting pancreas. I will eat better, and not eat everything I want. I will go back to eating right. I wonder how long I can actually continue this "Honeymoon"???I guess we will just have to see.