tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18195974402081769332024-03-06T13:01:28.686-07:00Chasing NumbersThe craziness of managing Diabetes in a child. An all and only about Type 1 Diabetes x's two in our house.Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.comBlogger671125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-64926828472839415342013-10-22T00:08:00.002-07:002013-10-22T00:10:56.429-07:00For ShamaeIn loving memory
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When words cease to come
When your heart simply says it isn't so
When nothing you can say will make it better, kneel and pray.
Many years ago I started this blog as a place to vent and cry my tears, at a time in my life where I couldn't see much but darkness surrounding me. My blog became a Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-54669258530421865892013-10-01T15:30:00.000-07:002013-10-01T15:30:27.606-07:00Summer, School and TIRED!!The Summer months, (as always) provided a time to be more relaxed about blood sugars, and apparently my tired brain decided to also take a break from middle of the night blood sugar checks way too often this Summer!! Nothing is more scary and frustrating than not waking up to an alarm clock when you NEED to. How can you not wake up to multiple set alarms!!?? I just dont understand it!! As a Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-59431192816137207702013-09-27T12:56:00.001-07:002013-09-27T13:18:35.548-07:00CrAzY 2013 so far, and second opinions!A quick re-cap of the 8 months hiatus from my blog, its been a very emotional and challenging year to say the least! (this post might get ridiculously long)
In February my husband was dx'd with skin cancer. Initially the Dermatologist called it a Squamous Cell Carcinoma, which caused a major freak out on my part. Although when detected early, Squamous Cell Carcinomas "rarely" metastasize, it Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-70765724451270900502013-09-26T19:55:00.001-07:002013-09-26T19:55:26.575-07:00Peers and PESo the drama with peers in 7th grade? Ohhhh my. Well, it goes something like this....
(According to Maddi)
"I dont think you should be eating that." (3 lifesavers before PE)
"What is that on your arm?" (pump site, Maddi says she has heard this about a "billion" times this year and GIRLS continually whisper and stare)
"You can run more for your Diabetes ya know"
"No wonder you have Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-58036727055785215752013-09-20T15:06:00.001-07:002013-09-20T15:06:14.900-07:00TEENAGER!!!!For many months I have taken a blogging break. It seems one day you wake up and life with Diabetes JUST IS, and honestly, for quite awhile now the last thing I have wanted to think about or talk about..... or even ACKNOWLEDGE, was Diabetes.
DONE. OVER IT. TIRED OF THE WORD. NOTHING LEFT TO SAY.
And just when I thought hoped there was nothing left to say, Maddison turned 13.
Enough said, Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-756293791349575792013-02-03T21:20:00.000-07:002013-02-03T21:20:26.773-07:00Running awayOn Friday night we we packed up last minute to run away from the craziness of everyday life. We have been meaning to escape on a mini family vacation to visit the snow up north for weeks and weeks, but with a husband that works 60 hours a week that includes Saturdays its hard to find the time. Over the years I've learned that planned trips aren't always the best trips, and sometimes you just Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-38545770315708583832013-01-23T13:12:00.004-07:002013-01-23T13:18:45.449-07:0034 and PMSA few weeks ago Maddison was running high, high, high. It used to be that "high" was 200-250's for Maddison, but nowadays the threshold of "high" has changed since the TWEEN years are here. 280's-380's is now not uncommon for high spells. GASP!!!
After 2-3 days of high patterns I get on those numbers!! I start by increasing basals around the clock, and if that doesnt work in 2 days or so, I Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-37872030442383716612013-01-21T23:15:00.000-07:002013-01-21T23:15:58.620-07:00IOB, not so NICE and randomsIOB, or Insulin on board is the amount of insulin you still have working to bring down your blood sugar. Tonight at bedtime Maddison needed a correction dose. She was 210 but entered 280 into her pump. She was simply careless I guess. For some reason tonight I decided to look over her pump history for the second time....I usually do every night as she sleeps...but I already did earlier in the dayKellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-23190067765188023002012-10-29T13:51:00.001-07:002012-10-29T16:59:03.770-07:00Our own worst criticsToday I've learned that I really just dont give myself enough credit. My A1c came back at 6.9% when I was SURE it would be darn smack in the middle of the 8's (based on my own crazy logic)if not higher. But no, as usual...my A1c was nowhere near what I expected. THANK GOODNESS!!
This morning Maddison and I both had Endo appointments, our last appointments were back in February!! 8 months ago!! Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-29890341904656886642012-09-24T14:56:00.000-07:002012-09-24T20:28:41.706-07:00The little thingsFor me, its the "little" things about Diabetes that add up to a tremendous melt down of my heart sometimes.
Last night I walked into Maddison's room without knocking, my bad. I was surprised to find that I startled her. I found that Maddi had just been secretly eating a "Fun dip" candy that she normally keeps stashed in her backpack for emergencies. -Sigh-
I just wanted to cry, right then andKellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-18625732148217073342012-09-12T22:26:00.002-07:002012-09-12T22:26:54.118-07:00"Dont Forget"Its 10pm.
Maddi's blood sugar is 83 with .375 insulin still active from dinner.
She pops 8c of a protein bar in her mouth, exhausted. She lies down on her pillow closing her eyes, anxiously waiting to re-check her number in about 20 minutes or so.
She should be sleeping, not worrying about blood sugars.
"DONT FORGET to recheck me in about 20 minutes if Im asleep!" Maddi says...
Oh sweet Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-47507528398597484682012-09-12T18:33:00.000-07:002012-09-12T18:33:47.093-07:00FreeI believe in miracles.
I believed to the bottom of my heart and soul that the Schuhmacher family would beat the odds.
I have hoped and prayed with every ounce of my being for the last 6 months that this remarkable family be blessed with a miracle.
They simply had to!!!
Meri is an online "D" Mom, Dad is Ryan, and together they have been raising 4 amazing boys....3 of the Schuhmacher boys Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-73356088034558023262012-08-29T11:29:00.002-07:002012-08-29T12:24:06.399-07:00Day 3 of 3 and No WordsToday is day 3 of watching Maddi's numbers closely, the day I would be making adjustments *IF* she were still running crazy high. But she isnt. -SIGH-
Today is a different day, not the same as the pattern I've seen over the last 2 days. Well, actually its been about a week since numbers have been behaving...but like always, throw in a decent day here and there and you cant really follow the 3 Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-31569919448760560602012-08-14T11:33:00.000-07:002012-08-14T11:33:13.111-07:00AloneMaddison started 6th grade yesterday, which at our school means she now has a home room and 3 different teachers. YIKES. Big responsiblity, alot of change, and with this also comes my decision to FINALLY have Maddison managing her Diabetes within the classroom. No more going to the school Nurse, unless troubleshooting is needed.
My heart is suddenly very, very sad.
Sad that Maddison has the Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-89819976528289696572012-08-07T13:26:00.000-07:002012-08-07T13:26:06.247-07:00AvoidingI have purposely been avoiding the Endocrinologist. For Maddison its been nearly 6 months since her last appointment, and I havent had one for almost a year!! There, I said it!! Now I feel less guilty for some reason :)
Why on earth would I avoid our FABULOUS Endo? Well, because hearing our A1c does nothing but make me question my efforts and abilities to tame this beast. Im never "happy" with Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-83723873969552796552012-07-26T10:14:00.000-07:002012-07-26T10:14:06.228-07:00It shouldn't beIt shouldn't be that I have to wake my sleeping child before I go to work in the Summer... in fear that she may go low and wont wake up, EVER AGAIN. But Diabetes says I have to.
It shouldn't be that when she is sick and I'm at work I have to tell her no naps. But Diabetes says I have to.
Sure, I could call home in an hour or two and have her check her blood sugar....but what if she didnt wakeKellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-16567343336575727162012-06-27T11:40:00.001-07:002012-06-27T11:40:21.668-07:00"Please Come Take Me Home"Last week Maddison finally returned home from 7 days away at Diabetes camp. I couldn’t wait to see her smiling face and listen to all her camp stories! My half empty heart felt complete again as soon as she stepped off that bus, and Maddison’s endless chatter filled the car on the drive home. Besides looking run down and super tan, she also looked as though she grew many inches! Summertime (just Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-37528710120308816292012-06-14T20:35:00.000-07:002012-06-14T20:35:18.416-07:00Its NOT the Damn Shots People!!Saturday morning before dropping Maddison off for camp we planned to meet her Dad for breakfast downtown where he was working. It ended up a bit chaotic to say the least! Not only was **I** the passenger being driven around by my 15yr old who newly has her driving permit, but we were in an area of town that I am NOT familiar with. YIKES. Enough said!!! We ended up lost for a short while trying toKellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-20047663096822071182012-06-08T23:50:00.001-07:002012-06-08T23:54:12.801-07:00Camp AZDA Year 2Tomorrow at noon Maddison leaves for CampAZDA. This will be just our second year sending Maddison to Diabetes camp, but let me tell ya, people aren't kidding when they say Diabetes Camp is something their child talks about all year! Maddison has had her suitcase packed for almost 3 weeks now, and has been eagerly anticipating camp since Spring break! So far I have been nearly worry free about Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-61961402307957021032012-05-30T10:14:00.000-07:002012-05-30T10:14:52.279-07:00It just AINT that easy
From Chasing Numbers
I wish I could just send Maddison off on summer "play dates" without a second thought. Do you still call it a "play date" at the age of 12? Almost 12 I should say, in August Maddison will be 12!!! Im having some issues accepting that. Really, I am. It isnt her age so much as it is the Diabetes independance....its the not knowing for sure whether or not she is taking care of Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-27264170588126354252012-05-30T09:00:00.000-07:002012-05-30T10:49:08.199-07:00The NumbersI've still been chasing numbers, but it isn't the highs anymore, now it is the Summer lows. Impending lows that is. We have been catching lows before they happen thanks to a quick blood sugar check 2hrs PP. Adjusting from school Diabetes to Summer Diabetes is always tricky those first days!
Summer means Maddison's insulin needs decrease tremendously, and it hasn't even yet been due to the Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-34926300835216401262012-05-07T23:49:00.003-07:002012-05-07T23:49:31.476-07:00May DaysLast week I FINALLY got Maddison's too high post breakfast numbers down! For two glorious days Maddison's numbers were p-e-r-f-e-c-t. PERFECT!! Call me a weirdo (or just totally and completely RELEAVED)) but I seriously had tears in my eyes when Maddison's number card came home from the school Nurse each day showing those beautiful blood sugars. Really, I did have tears in my eyes, I DID! I was Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-53094134273582225842012-05-02T13:42:00.001-07:002012-05-02T13:51:58.214-07:00ChatterWhen Im feeling defeated by Diabetes, the voices in my head seem to explode into a constant whirlwind of chatter. I end up unable to focus, totally scatter brained!! Drained. Overwhelmed. Feeling hopeless and helpless. Every hour leaves me looking at the clock, wondering what Maddison’s blood sugar is doing now. Is it time to check? Its been two hours since breakfast, we better get that 2hr PP Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-84346173331988361502012-04-17T10:35:00.005-07:002012-04-17T12:45:07.811-07:00Some DaysIts funny how some days you feel like a super Pancreas. Numbers are mostly in range. Predictable. Maybe you make a change to insulin dosing here or there, and it works perfectly! Oh sweet blood sugar victory!Then there are the days when you are seeing too many lows or highs, yet we know (and feel) that it is JUST a number. You do what you gotta do. Make a change. Again. Again. Again. A week or Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1819597440208176933.post-57494151716926075982012-03-19T14:43:00.002-07:002012-03-19T14:49:54.058-07:00Negative Negative NegativeMaddison's Celiac biopsy just came back NEGATIVE. Enough said! Lactose intolerance results take about another week, so for now we just hope that the group of symptoms Maddi has been having disappears....Perhaps in the future if symptoms persist or again worsen I will consider doing a gluten challenge for Maddison, or allergy testing. But for now, its SPRING BREAK!!Kellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17009502794324247532noreply@blogger.com1