47 today in the same time frame. Followed by a 418. More dosing changes for tomorrow. I'm so discouraged, I'm speechless about it all.
I searched the Internet for hours today, trying to prove to myself that Maddison really does need a biopsy to rule out Celiac disease. I know all of Maddison's labs came back fine without any antibodies indicating Celiac......but Maddison also doesn't have any anti-islet cell antibodies, anti-insulin antibodies or anti-glutamic decarboxylase antibodies (GAD)!!! Maybe she just doesnt have Celiac antibodies!!?? Celiac's absorption issues would explain alot right now, especially when Maddison has at least 9 red flag symptoms of Celiac disease including bone growth delay and short stature. November 3rd we see the Endo....I have alot of questions!
Strange thing, today Maddison asked me if I think she has Celiac. "Why?" I asked. "Because every time I eat my stomach hurts" she said. -Sigh- I think Maddison is tired of hurting and just wants an answer. So do I.
Being entirely discouraged today didnt stop me from sitting down with the dreaded log book. This is my child here Diabetes! We never give up! So, what did I see? Saturdays and Sundays Maddison hasn't had a low in months. On Mondays Maddison is ALWAYS high. I think that's called Miserable Monday Syndrome. On Fridays Maddison is always low or leaning towards that way. I think thats called "hooray the week is over excitement." Tuesday through Thursdays......are whatever they choose to be. Randomly. Talk about discouraged.
I wish I had something good to talk about today, I really do. Unfortunately, when I picked up Maddison from school she was about to burst into tears. She held them back with all her might until she couldn't anymore, and then she sobbed. I've been dreading this day. Maddison's teacher gives an ice cream celebration party to the kids that meet the addition/subtraction goal for this month. That goal is finishing timed tests in 3 minutes without error. Try, try and try again....Maddison just can't do it. So, now Maddison will sit in another classroom while all the other kids "celebrate" their success and Maddison feels nothing but failure. How nice.
I already talked to the teacher months ago about how I felt this "celebration" was wrong in so many ways. Her suggestion was to study hard. What about the kids that couldn't pass the tests timely but got every answer right? Too bad. What about the kids that DID give their best effort? Now they have to feel bad about themselves because they aren't up to the level of everyone else? Hows that for humiliation? I'm so ticked off about this "celebration" I cant even see straight! On top of the "celebration" being wrong in so many ways, Maddison herself has been through SO much lately. She's already feeling depressed and discouraged in math. THIS was the last thing she needed right now. Did I also mention that Math is right after lunch? You know, the time frame in which Diabetes FREAKS OUT and strikes Maddison with life threatening lows here and there. I cant help but be ticked off for Maddison missing this celebration when she's missing math time most days of the week for a f'ed up disease that wont leave her alone to learn in class!!! UGH!!
Ok, something good.....I will mention our JDRF Walk is Saturday on Halloween! That's something to be excited about! Then its Hannah's birthday! My baby Hannah will be 13!! THIRTEEN!!! Which makes me feel very old! Then the holidays........ewwwww......I could do without those. But, tomorrow is a new day. I think I have a plan. Look forward and not back..........just keep swimming.......
Moving my blog again
3 years ago